What’s the value exchange? A simple filter for better choices

“Value exchange” was a phrase my old team knew well. I’d ask, What’s the value exchange? In other words: does what you put in match what you get out? If the answer was no, it was time to review.

We mainly used it to assess talent we represented. Was the income proportional to the time, effort, and emotional labor we invested? It extended to meetings and events, too. If an agency could only offer event invites (not paid campaigns), did a 3 hour lunch meeting make sense over a quick coffee or Zoom? Probably not. If we were working with a publisher on a major book deal, would spending half a day at their office be worth it? Definitely.

Over time I noticed I use the same filter in everyday life. My brain now runs an automatic check: Does input ≈ output? And it’s not just about money. I look at time, energy, enjoyment, and opportunity.

I recently shared this with a client who struggled to say no to after-work socials. She’s in a senior role, so climbing the ladder via events isn’t really the game anymore… but FOMO crept in. I asked her to assess the value exchange before RSVPing:

• Network: Will people be there I genuinely want to meet?

• Enjoyment: Is this likely to be fun enough that I won’t mind the lost sleep (or mild hangover)?

• Desire vs. Duty: Do I actually want to go, or do I feel obliged?

She’d never asked herself these questions. Once she did, two things happened: she got more value from the events she chose and felt less guilt about skipping the rest.

Give it a go. Before you commit, ask: What’s the value exchange across time, energy, enjoyment, money, and opportunity?

If the answer is looking a bit unbalanced, saying no is the smart move.

Sometimes you’ll choose a short-term “unequal” exchange because serendipity, learning, or relationships compound later. The point is to choose it on purpose.